The only way to have a friend is to be one. --Ralph Waldo Emerson
I know my weakness. I can't control my temper when I'm criticized in public. Without any constraint, I backfire instantly. I don't deserve the treatment while I'm serving others to the best interest for all. Why am I challenged? Why am I bullied? Why do I have a public humiliation?
I left the restaurant alone after dinner, took a walk on Deck 7-Promenade. I was all alone. It was a rainy, windy, and chilly typhoon evening when I saw the pilot boat left Sun Princess at sea. When the light of the small boat floating on crashing waves faded away in dark, I was so frustrated that I felt like jumping into the sea, like the protagonist of the seventh night in Ten Nights of Dreams by Natsume Souseki.
The seventh night's dream begins with the dreamer finding himself on board a large ship and does not know where the ship is headed. The dreamer faces a sense of being completely lost as he didn't know where the boat was headed or when he would be able to get off. The dreamer contemplates on jumping off the ship into the sea instead of staying on the ship due to his feeling of being lost. Nights pass and the dreamer becomes even more unhappy as the other passengers seem to have forgotten that they were on a ship. Finally the dreamer decides to kill himself. With no one around one night, he jumps into sea, but regrets it immediately.
Luckily, I came across many new books about stress management at Taipei City Library after I got home. I realize that the peer pressure with friends stress me out. And I need to manage fight-or-flight response skillfully when I feel threatened. I need to learn to ride the wave of life, imagine the water calm and still deep below the strongest of storms with huge crashing waves.
Mindfulness is about slowing down, seeing things clearly, and paying attention moment to moment to moment. We notice what is happening, as it is taking place and we are more aware of our body, our emotions, and our thoughts, to live in the present moment. We use five senses--sight, sound, taste, touch, and smell--to notice our body and surroundings in order to bing ourselves into the now. And, I accept all of my emotions!
THE GUEST HOUSE
This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they're a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.
--Rumi
Practice mindful STOPPING before action or reaction in stressful moments.
1. Visualize a stop sign.
2. Check in with body, from tips of toes, move upto the top of head.
3. Breath in one, breathe out one, for a count of ten breaths.
4. Bring in air through a small hole at the top of the head, let breath move through the body and release it through the tips of toes.
Get the facts!
1. Say, "Stop it!" to yourself.
2. Think positively. See other sides of the story rather than focusing on what you "think" you know.
3. Realize that not everyone thinks as you do. Seek out the facts before you react.
4. Ask yourself, "Am I jumping to conclusion?"
5. Ask for the truth.
Thought Stopping
1. Notice the thought that causes anxiety
2. Picture a bright red stop sign
3. Exchange the anxious thought for a peaceful thought
4. Say the peaceful thought in your mind
5. Keep the peaceful thought till the anxious thought is completely gone
"Mile by mile it's a trial; yard by yard it's hard; but inch by inch it's a cinch." -Anonymous
No comments:
Post a Comment