Division H Humorous Speech and Evaluation Contests

Failure is a bitter medicine hard to swallow after a huge investment of time and money! When the contest master announced the result, I felt a taste of bitter sweetness. What would I do if I were given the second chance to deliver myself at Division H Humorous Speech and Evaluation Contests? Would I do otherwise? The answer is, without a shadow of doubt, a big yes, because I want to win!

What I could have done and should have done was find a Toastmasters club or two to rehearse my humorous speech, listen to feedback of the audience and evaluators, fine tune my speech draft, reorganize my delivery. A humorous speech at the District level is a grand piece of performing art, it requires a group effect from all angles of perspectives.

I failed the humorous contest 2012, because I did it on my own single-handed in my ivory tower, without seeking for scrutiny and advice in a real situation. My humorous speech turned out to be a dress rehearsal with me juggling the props and gadgets in my hands prematurely. The audience couldn't remember what I said in my speech, they were overwhelmed with a busy contestant loss of memory and loss of sight.

Like all Toastmasters, I want to deliver my speech to the best of my ability to entertain and to inspire the audience. However, I failed to connect to the audience from the third act of my speech, the climax of my speech about the Grandriders in Taiwan. Because I misplaced my kazoo, I couldn't find it, I looked angst and frustrated on stage, the momentum of the audience dropped, the energy of the audience plumped, I lost the audience for all. Even in the end, I put on the beautiful Miss Beauty of Age sash, I couldn't win the hearts of the judges back before the curtain came down!

Nevertheless, being the double first runner-ups at Division H humorous speech and evaluation contests 2012, I had many reasons to be happy. I made the best use the stage as a runway to present my Autumn fashion 2013. I tried out my humorous speech with the lyrical for the first time. I learned a painful lesson and I gained a valuable experience!

Now I'm eager to get ready for the tabletopics and international speech in April 2013. Till I claim the championship, I shall come back again and again and again on stage to become a better communicator and leader in Toastmasters! Now you know my taste of the bitter sweetness of being the first runner-ups, there is a goal at the far end for me to reach, to reach, to reach...

Audio-visual Laboratory in Toastmasters

It was after I listened to "Writing "the lyrical": Historical Imprints in Shake-xique" presented by Professor Fan Chen of National Normal Universirty at the 2012 NTU International Theater Conference Sunday morning, October 21st, I was prompted to add "the lyrical" in my humorous speech "Miss Beauty of Age".

I'm excited to witness the aesthetic effect of the acoustic and ocular luxury of my humorous speech rewrite with the lyrical upon the audience at Division H Humorous Speech Contest at MacKay Hospital New Building 15F Auditorium, Saturday evening, October 27th.

In Act I "Loss of Memory", I shall sing a verse of "Memory" of Musical Cats with high pitch head resonance, "Memory, all alone in the moonlight ". In Act II "Loss of Sight", I shall sing a verse of "Amazing Grace" with low pitch chest resonance, "Was blind, but now I see". In Act III, I shall blow a verse of Frank Sinatra's "My Way" with a kazoo, "I did it my way". It'll be a breakthrough for me to challenge my oral communication skills in exaggerating the emotions and feelings with the lyrical variety.

Year 2012 is a fruitful theatrical year for me. I joined the Tellus Theater in March, the Playback theater in April, the Red Room Radio Redux in May, the 5th Taipei Fringe Festival in September. When I sat in the audience at the 2012 NTU International Theater Conference this morning, I was so contented that I understood the language of the speakers and I became an enthusiastic practitioner in the field of theater.

What I have in mind for my future speeches in Toastmasters, I'm tempted to include Sonnets, Rap and Rag, or any given lyrical forms to increase the theatrical excitements in my speech performance. It's a triumph to make people happy in an audio-visual laboratory in Toastmasters.

Joint Grand & Galaxy Toastmasters Club Meeting

It was a full house of Toastmasters and friends at the joint Grand and Galaxy Toastmasters Club Meeting Wednesday evening, October 17th. It was a full house of laughter, because two prepared speakers from Galaxy rehearsed their humorous speeches to be presented at the Joint Area C1 & C4 Humorous Speech Contest the coming Saturday, October 20th.

Toastmaster Jimmy Wu was generous as always to prepare Pizza and steam-fried dumplings on the iron plate for those who came to the joint meeting directly from work!

After the joint meeting, Agnes and Yvonne joined Grand's second party at McDonald's till 10:30PM. They were anxious to seek for recommendations and suggestions to improve their debut performance. President May Hwang, Area H1 Governor Yvan Chu and I were eager to offer our ideas and thoughts to help them break a leg on stage.

To my greatest delight, Agnes and Yvonne won the first and second places at Joint Area C1 & C4 speech contest. Their success made the joint Grand and Galaxy meeting meaningful and significant! I was proud of them, so were Granders and Galaxiers!

I'm more than sure Agnes and Yvonne will excel their communication skills at Division C Humorous speech contest Sunday, November 4th! My best wishes are extended to Agnes and Yvonne to advance to another level in Toastmasters arena! I must not fall behind to hone my communication skills at the coming Division H speech contest at MacKay Hospital Saturday evening, October 27th! Go, go, go, Miss Beauty of Age!

Joint Area H1 & H3 Speech Contest

Area H1 Humorous Speech Contest

President May Hwang and I represented Grand Toastmasters Club to participate in Area H1 Humorous Speech Contest at MacKay Hospital Sunday afternoon, October 14th. I was recruited at the last minute to replace IPP Gina Cheng, because of her sudden back pain. To my pleasure, I won the first place! Pierre Chen from MOFA TMC and I shall represent Area H1 to compete at Division H Humorous Speech Contest at MacKay Hospital, Saturday evening, October 27th.

For my humorous speech at Division H contest, it'll be the first time I apply the theater theory to my delivery. I divide my speech into prologue, act I, II, III, and epilogue. I'm eager to experience the impact upon the audience! The script is as follows, your comments and suggestions are highly appreciated!

Area H1 Evaluation Contest

Educational Vice President Sharen Chen and I represented Grand Toastmasters Club to participate in Area H1 Evaluation Contest at MacKay Hospital Sunday afternoon, October 14th. Both of us won the contest, and we shall represent Area H1 to compete at Division H Evaluation contest at MacKay Hospital, Saturday evening, October 27th.

From Sharen Chen's performance at the evaluation contest, I witnessed the rapid growth of a junior Toastmaster in communication and leadership skills. Sharen took the challenge to stand up and speak up on stage, it's the most effective way to become a better communicator and leader.

Miss Beauty of Age

Prologue 0'00"~1'00"

Life is about...! Life is about...!  (The speaker picks up a piece of paper from her pocket and reads it aloud!) 
Loss of memory! It can happen to me. It can happen to you! Sooner or later, for better and for worse!

How many times do you forget lines when you're on stage at a Toastmasters speech contest? How many times have you forgotten where you parked your car? Don't feel bad. Some people forget to say "I do" at the wedding ceremony. Many people forget to say "I love you" on their anniversaries. Some people even forget they are married!

Act I 1'00"~3'00" 

Memory loss is becoming a threat to me and to my husband. Fortunately we still find our way home and recognize each other in bed. Early this month, the first Wednesday evening, I was excited to join Grand Toastmasters club's in-house speech contest after work. I tried to memorize my speech so hard that I discovered to my dismay that I had gone to our club's old meeting venue.

Memory, all alone in the moonlight. (The speaker sings "Memory".) I was in a panic and rushed to our new meeting venue just in time to present my speech, I ended up forgetting one third of my humor!

However, the loss of memory is not a bad thing. Forgetting your enemies makes you forgive your enemies. Life actually becomes more beautiful!

Act II 3'00"~5"00"

Why am I standing here? Who am I? (The speaker picks up a small mirror in her pocket.)

The pocket mirror is too small to fit my face!

There is a mirror on the table. But I can't see my face well. Let me try the other side of the mirror, 5 timers bigger. (The speaker uses a bigger table mirror 5X to see herself better.)

Was blind, but now I see! (The speaker sings "Amazing Grace".)

Oh, mirror mirror mirror on the table! Aging is a slow process of decay, in two opposite directions, expanding and diminishing. The bags under my eyes, bigger and bigger; my sight, weaker and weaker!

Sight loss has become a thread to me and to my husband. Last Friday evening, my husband was excited to bring home an x-rated DVD. After dinner, he went to his study planning how to play the DVD, I was in the kitchen wondering why. We were in bed early after a good shower. When he turned on the DVD player, he threw me the remote control. Without reading glasses, I couldn't find the play key. My husband became impatient and asked me just to press every button, but that did not work. I gave him the remote control and he struggled himself with it for a long while. In the end, we were so exhausted and frustrated that we decided to call it a night!

The loss of sight is not a bad thing. I can't see details, flaws of others, I see big pictures. My eyes are closed, but my ears are open. I become a better listener. Life actually becomes more beautiful.

Act III 5'00"~6'30"

Yes, the beauty of age is about loss of memory, loss of sight, but not loss of hope!

Look at the Grandriders in Taiwan! Seventeen octagenarians with all diseases and disorders in the medical dictionary rode around the island and brought Taiwan to the International stage. They demonstrate without a shadow of doubt the beauty of age with spirit, energy, and friendship!

They did it their way!  (The speaker sings "My Way".)

If it can happen to them, it can happen to us!

Epilogue 6'30"~7'00"

Fellow Toastmasters and friends,  (The speaker puts on the Miss Beauty sash and crown!)

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. The Beauty of age is the courage to dream, to learn, to take the challenge. Look at this Miss Beauty of Age in front of you. If it can happen to her. It can happen to you! Contest Chair!

Harvest Festival in Amis

There is one month plus to memorize three aboriginal songs in Puyuma and Amis by heart before GLs' opening dance at D67 Fall Conference 2012 dinner party at New Taipei City Auditorium of 1,400 seats Saturday evening, November 17th!

Toastmaster Michelle Liu and Trini Ding selected three most popular aboriginal songs at the moment in Taiwan. Toastmaster Su-jen Houng rearranged the music to achieve the best the acoustic effect.  Many thanks go to Hua-lien Toastmasters Club for their support of the grand opening dance on stage!

The first is Song of Puyuma by Samingad. Puyuma were the most warlike indigenous people in Taiwan. Every year the tribe holds the Monkey Ceremony for young men to go through strict trials to build courage. After this, the young boy is considered a man eligible for marriage.

The second and third are songs of Amis. Amis tribe is the biggest tribe in Taiwan. They hold harvest festivals is July and August. The festival has three stages, welcoming the spirits, feasting the spirits, and sending the spirits off.

I. Song of Puyuma by Samingad

ho ai yi e yan yi e yan ho ai yi yan ho yi yan
se me na se na ai sa yi san ho ai yi yan ho yi yan

hi yo yan hai yo yan na ru hay yan
ho yi yan na ru hay yan ho yi yan naru hay yan
ho yi yo ho yi yan

hi yo in naru hay yan hi yo in naru hay yan
ho i yan naru hay ya na yi yan o hay yan

II. Amis Cha Cha

ta la cowa kako a milimaw 我去參加婚禮的囍宴
ma a law ko kelo no kayoing看到kayoing(小姐)的舞姿
a cha～a ko kelo ngala 哇～那優美的舞姿！

si a yaw han ni faki 舞台下的faki(公、叔、舅)
ma a law ko' cpi no kayoing 看到kayoing的性感美腿
tarangalay～ko pising ni faki 臉紅得忍不住地流下口水

iwayu ko ta tele' c can 扭腰擺臀
a cuya cuy ko faluhang 波滔胸湧
sa mo cidal ko mata ni faki 讓faki的眼睛為之一亮

ta la cowa kako a milimaw 我去參加婚禮的囍宴
ma a law ko pakahow no kayoing 看到kayoing扭腰擺臀
a cha～a ko kelo no kayoing 哇～多優美的舞姿啊！

III. Ode to Naluwan

Naluwan Naluwan do yi yo han yo han hi ya
Naluwan Naluwan do yi yo han yo han hi ya

Ho yi ya na yi yo yi yan ho hi yan
Ho yi yan na yi yo han hi yan
Yi e ya ho yi ya na he yo han hi ya

Naluwan ha ya
Naluwan ha ya

Year of Lucky Seven

Two birthday Superstars in Green and Red at the front row

Hooray, I'm 57 today! I shall be entitled to join free classes for senior citizens in New Taipei City in 2013! In three years, I shall be 60, what a joy it'll be to complete a Chinese sexagenary cycle. When I reach 65, I can enjoy the government pension, free bus tickets, free entrance to public museums, and discounted tickets for MRT and high speed rail.

The birthday party of Virginia and me at Jimmy's Lounge was boisterous with Taiwan Beer, Australian Red Wine, Maltese Champagne, authentic traditional Chinese dishes, oolong tea, desserts, singing, dancing, chatting, laughing, maybe a little flirting, ...

Birthday Dinner Menu:
1. Appetizers--Preserved salted Radish with and without cilantro
 2. Dim Sum—Chinese Taco and Sesame bread stuffed with ground pork, Romaine lettuce
3. Vegetables and Bean curd--fried celery with bean curd, fried water bamboo with bean curd
 4. Meat & Poultry—Braised pork knuckle in aged soy brine, Mandarin Duck with sweet paste
5. Needles served with Beijing Da-lu in chicken broth
 6. Desserts—fresh star fruits, water pears, Japanese Persimmon, Matcha Birthday Cake

Virginia is a younger and more talented Libra version of me. She played Amazing Grace on the piano beautifully. Take a look at her splendid  photo album of our annual joint birthday party! Virginia insists she and I are so alike yet so different in our own way but luckily we understand, and tolerate each other's schizophrenia to the fullest.

Trini is the only Golden Lady Toastmaster who made it to the joint birthday party. She and I gave a trial performance of aboriginal dance at the birthday party. The music arrangement was a huge success. Everybody hummed along with excitements!  Now we have confidence in our opening dance at  D67 Fall Conference 2012 in New Taipei City in November. We're one step closer to our dream dance on stage!

Joyce is an awesome saxophone player, she is the main entertainer. She played Taiwanese, Mandarin, English songs for us to sing along. She caught attention in the crowd with her sweet sweet smile on her pretty face! Let's go to her concert in the future! Joy and I met her for the first time at the Red Room in March. Please find time to visit the  Red Room to meet up with people from all over the world every third Saturday evening.

Trista, a graduate student of Taipei Medical School, gets the grant from Department of Health for her research of the aboriginal tribe nutrition in Hsin-chu. She is a writer, poet, singer. She would have sung Taiwanese songs if she had brought her guitar along. Trista and I are the charter members of Red Room Radio Redux. We had the debut performance at Taipei Fringe 2012 in September.

May Huang (Incumbent President of  Grand Toastmasters Club) came to see my debut theater "Open Your Ears" at the Red Room, Yvan (Incumbent Area H1 Governor) and I saw "Zambies Attack Taipei" at Taipei Fringe 2012. May, Yvan and I extend our open arms to welcome all of you to visit Grand's regular meetings on the first and third Wednesday evenings.

May Cheng is my neighbor and my Playback partner. We went to Hua-lien Playback assembly in August this year. I fell in love with Hua-lien and wished to home stay there for a couple of months.

Golden Leaf is my money manager. She is eager to make everybody rich. She invites her boss to give us updated information about real estate and financial investment. They didn't speak English, but they were probably the second craziest team singing and dancing on the floor without reservation, next to two birthday stars.

Last but not least, my dear husband Azen and my sweet brother Jimmy, many thanks to them for their support and love. My sister Ruth came later to pick up her domestic helper who helped clean the house and set the table before the birthday party.

What a memorable birthday party featuring all guests to say sweet words to one another and to perform on stage to unleash their talents! Partying, partying, looking forward to many crazier and merrier birthday parties in the years to come!

The Beauty of Age

In youth the days are short and the years are long; in old age the years are short and the days long. ~Nikita Ivanovich Panin

October is a glorious month. The Republic of China (ROC) was born in October, so was I on the 9th, one day before my country on the double tenth. Walking on the streets in Taipei, I see many national flags* flying high in the air and I'm feeling high!

October is a busy month for Toastmasters, countless speech contests are lining up, from in-house, area, division, to district. I joined both humorous speech contest and evaluation contest this evening. It felt great to stand up and speak up in front of fellow club members. Many thanks go to judges from sister clubs to support Grand's in-house speech contest in 2012.

The Beauty of Age

Life is about...! Life is about...! (The speaker picks up a small piece of paper from her pocket, but she can't read the words on it. She uses a magnifier to read it aloud!)

Loss of memory! It can happen to me. It can happen to you! Sooner or later, for better and for worse!

How many times you forget lines when you're on stage at a Toastmasters speech contest? How many times you forget where you park your car? Don't feel bad. Some people forget to say "I do" at the wedding ceremony. Many people forget to say "I love you" on their anniversaries. Some people forget they are married!

Last month, I had the debut theater performance at Taipei Fringe Festival, featuring Shakespeare. Me, Juliet, at my age, of course not. I didn't forget my lines, I flipped two pages faster as the narrator and the actors looked at me in awe not knowing what to do next!

The loss of memory is not a bad thing. Forgetting your enemies makes you forgiving your enemies. Life becomes more beautiful!

Why am I standing here? Who am I? (The speaker picks up a small mirror in her purse, but she can't see her face well. She uses a bigger table mirror 5X to see herself better.)

Oh, mirror mirror mirror on the table! Aging is a slow process of decay, in two opposite directions, swelling and shrinking. My eye bags, bigger and bigger, my saddle bags, heavier and heavier. But shrinking ~ (the speaker holds the breast)!

Last Friday evening, my husband was excited to bring home an x-rate DVD. After dinner, he went to his study planning how, I was in the kitchen wondering why. We were in bed early after a good shower. When he turned on the DVD player, he threw me the remote control. Without reading glasses, I couldn't find the play key. My husband became impatient and asked me just to press every button, no work. I gave him the remote control and he struggled for a long while. In the end, we were so exhausted and frustrated and decided to call it a night!

William Shakespeare said, "all the world's a stage, in the seventh stage, mere oblivion, sans eyes, sans everything." The loss of sight is not a bad thing. We can't see details, flaws of others, we see big pictures. Life becomes more beautiful.

The beauty of age is about loss of memory, loss of sight, but not loss of hope!

Look at the Grandriders in Taiwan! Seventeen octagenarians with all diseases and disorders in the medical dictionary rode around the island and brought Taiwan on International stage, they demo the beauty of age with spirit, energy, and friendship! It can happen to them, it can happen to us!

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. Beauty is the courage to dream, to learn, to take the challenge. Take a look at the beauty of age in front of you. It can happen to me. It can happen to you!

Contest Chair! 
*青天白日滿地紅旗: 1906年孫中山先生設計。 (1) 青天：自由。(2) 白日：平等。(3) 滿地紅：博愛。(4) 十二道光芒：象徵每日12時辰，每年12月份，喻自強不息之意。